Dont Ishmael your Valentine

Updated: Feb 26, 2019

Feb 14 2018

Valentines Day.... oh the dreadful Valentines day. The day where bitterness creeps into all of the single ladies and they (we) sit around wondering where our #MCM is. Throughout my season of healing I saw a lot of broken hearts, a lot of break ups, broken engagements, and divorce. Enough to last a lifetime, and I'm only 25. 

I have been personally been praying for a break through Valentines day, and during prayer I was given an unexpected answer. I've already had break throughs, and it was time to share.

When thinking about relationships my mind went to the beginning of all things, Genesis. Specifically when man was created "The Lord said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him" Genesis 2:18

During the creation story after making many animals for the man God realized that none of them sufficed, so he put the man to sleep to make a woman. I find it interesting that he put the man to sleep for this. I think it is because we as human's tend to mess things up pretty easily. If God would've kept Adam awake and explained his entire plan Adam probably would've still questioned it. "Are you sure God?? I know that you have a plan, and you know all things... but are you sure?? Taking a rib from me sounds a little crazy. I'm not sure this will work. What's a woman any how?" Doubt and fear would've crept in like it does on all of us, so God took matters into his own hands because he knew EXACTLY what he was doing. 

Thinking about this led me to think about my favorite story in the bible; the story of Abraham, Sarah, and Hagar. Abraham went through many trials where God spoke to him directly. One of the main things God kept telling him was that although Sarah could not have children God would provide them with a child. Sarah WOULD have a baby. (God threw  little spoiler pretty early on in that story) Years passed, the couple grew old, but God kept telling Abraham that he would have a child. Over, and over, and over again.

Now, as with any human, doubt set in with the couple. So,  after years of no baby Sarah told Abraham that there was no way she would be able to have babies, and told him to sleep with their slave, Hagar. Which, no shocker here, Hagar became pregnant with a son that she and Abraham would name Ishmael. Sarah started to despise her. She regretted the decision she made. (It was old testament scandals and drama- some real soap opera stuff.)

God once again came to Abraham and told him that he would have a son. Abraham heard God's promise so many times that he finally laughed, and he questioned God. "Abraham fell face down; he laughed and said to himself, bear a child at the age of ninety?" Genesis 17:17

After that God sent three visitors to once again reassure Abraham and Sarah that they would have a child, which made Sarah laugh this time. "Then one of them said, 'I will surely return to you about this time next year, and Sarah your wife will have a son.' Now Sarah was listening at the entrance to the tent, which was behind him. Abraham and Sarah were already very old, and Sarah was past the age of childbearing. So Sarah laughed to herself as she thought, 'After I am worn out and my lord is old, will I now have this pleasure?" (I sense sarcasm, Sarah)

Sure enough.. just as God had promised... how many times?? (trivia question) Abraham and Sarah had Issac. A son of their own. 

This story leads me to questions, and it leads me to answers. God was extremely straight forward with Abraham. He was talking to him with clarity that I think everyone wishes they had from God. It was straight forward- you will have a son with Sarah. BOOM. So, why is it that they didnt listen? Why didnt they wait and trust? Why is it that they and so many of us feel like we have to take matters into our own hands?

God states in Genesis 2:18 that man is not suppose to be alone, so why do we as females feel like we will never find our soul mate when, hello, a God fearing man cant and wont be alone. He wasnt created to be. (obviously the men need the women)

The story of Abraham, Sarah, and Hagar come with many trials. It wasnt in God's plan for them to have Ishmael (of course God still blessed Ishmael, because he's an amazing God) But God revealed his plan clear as day and no one listened to him. Maybe your story isnt as "out there" as this one, but I guarantee you are trying to take matters into your own hands when all you have to do is ask God and wait.

The biggest take away I got from this is what I like to call "Ishmael...or Ismaeling". Which basically, in my terms, means to force something outside of God's plan for you. Dont jump into one relationship to the next trying to "Ishmael" the life that YOU want.

Pause. Ask. Listen.

What is God saying? Maybe, just maybe, he isnt done with your husband yet. Maybe he isnt done with you yet. If you're single stop and smell the roses. Enjoy this special time. God has you in this place for a reason- ask him why. If you're in a relationship then stop and double check with the big man upstairs to make sure it is the one HE wants for you. At the end of the day his plan always comes through. (He's pretty clutch) There is absolutely nothing you can do to mess up God's plan or mess up the soul mate he has chosen for you. (UHHHM Hello- Sarah sent her husband to sleep with their slave and they still managed to make the marriage work as well as have the baby that God promised)

So dont Ishmael your Valentine.

To Ismael is to force. 

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